Red One

Starring: Dwayne Johnson, Chris Evans, J.K. Simmons, Lucy Liu, Bonnie Hunt, Kristofer Hivju, Kiernan Shipka, Mary Elizabeth Ellis, Wesley Kimmel, Nick Kroll
Directed by: Jake Kasdan
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Action, Adventure, Comedy
2024

Times Seen:
Tim: 1

Summary: After Santa Claus (J.K. Simmons) is kidnapped, the North Pole Head of Security (Dwayne Johnson) must team with a global hacker (Chris Evans) to save Christmas.

Review:

Tim: Red One is an ill-conceived mess of a film that further pushes the narrative that Netflix cares about getting viewers to watch, not about the quality of their movies. Oh sure, this film has everything that would draw your attention- big stars, a Santa-focused action comedy, visual effects. Of course, people are going to watch. But, when they do, what will they see? I saw a mostly uninspired film is saddled by a weak script. I saw a lot of people going through the motions. There's very little to enjoy with this film.

I do think Jake Kasdan has talent as a director. The script really hurts this movie. I also have to admit, it kind of felt like Kasdan phoned this one in. It feels like a strictly paint-by-numbers affair. I don't believe he felt any real passion for this project- it's like he was hired to do a job and he showed up to do that job. Maybe that works in some professions, but not in the arts. The whole thing is pretty stupid. I couldn't believe I had to write the summary- Santa is kidnapped. There's a Head of Security for the North Pole, who has to team with this dastardly (but has a heart of gold) hacker guy to start a global hunt for Santa. Oh, there's Abominable Snowmen, Krampus makes an appearance, there's some winter witch person. The whole thing is pretty nonsensical and the movie never sells us on any of this. It's like a hodgepodge of Christmas-related things all mixed up into a stew that just tastes nasty.

The cast felt disappointing to me. You have Dwayne Johnson playing the exact same role he's played two dozen times. I used to love Johnson, but his misses are much more frequent than his hits. This movie is bland. He seems on autopilot, giving the same performance with the same approach, same tone. You wonder if he ever gets sick of the repetition, or if the money keeps him focused. He's average. I love Chris Evans, but I think he's struggled a bit with some of his choices recently. This one feels way too safe- the smart alecky, fast-talking actor is firmly in his wheelhouse. He's played this exact role multiple times before. He at least brings energy to the film, so I can't completely fault him. But, this isn't a great performance and it's in one of the least effective movies he's made in a while. There might be some enjoyment from the Johnson-Evans pairing, I'll admit that.

The supporting cast was stronger, but they're all limited in their roles. J.K. Simmons was an inspired choice for Santa and I actually loved how he approached the big guy. Unfortunately, he's kidnapped early on and plays a very small role. The movie would have been better had his role been enlarged. I loved seeing Lucy Liu here- where the heck has she been? But of course, she gets absolutely nothing to do. It's a waste of her talent. Bonnie Hunt was brilliantly cast as Mrs. Claus, but again, nothing to do. Nick Kroll was solid in a humorous smaller role. Kristofer Hivju did solid work as Krampus, but he's unrecognizable under the CGI. Kiernan Shipka made an intriguing villain- I didn't love her performance, but it felt like somewhat inspired casting. She wasn't the safe choice, which was nice to see.

The story feels not fully baked. The characters move forward, doing this thing or that thing and it's all somewhat ambiguous and rarely makes a great deal of sense. There's a few decent action sequences- the snowman battle is dumb, but it does have some entertaining aspects. The story pays lip service to character development- one character is about to retire, the other needs to find the goodness inside of him. It's all so predictable and rote. There's no spark to any of the characters. I suppose the movie gets credit for at least attempting to show some depth to the characters, even if the actual depth is a bit of an illusion. The movie does try to dig down, but it's still mostly surface-level.

I'll admit Red One isn't a terrible movie, but it's a sadly lackluster one. It's average in every single aspect of filmmaking and it doesn't do anything especially well. Kasdan keeps the action movie so that it's not torture to watch- even though it's laughable that the film clocks in over 2 hours long. In this film's case, I'm not sure what the path to being good would have been. The plot is badly constructed and then the movie relies on multiple safe choices, verses taking any real risks. The visuals are average, nothing special. The movie isn't really funny, despite a lot of focus on comedy. Maybe it really is a movie for 13 year-olds only- that's probably the right demographic. Any more experienced or thoughtful viewers will find substantially more problems with this film. It's disappointing to have so many individual elements that feel strong, yet for them mostly to get washed out by the general unpleasantness of the film. Let's just pray there's no Red Two.

Rating 1-10
Tim's Rating: 6



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