Total Recall

Starring: Colin Farrell, Jessica Biel, Kate Beckinsale, Bryan Cranston, Bill Nighy, Bokeem Woodbine, John Cho
Directed by: Len Wiseman
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Action, Adventure, Science Fiction
2012

Times Seen:
Tim: 1

Summary: A factory worker (Colin Farrell) goes to Rekall to live out the experience of being a spy. However, before he goes under, he is attacked by government forces. As he fights to stay alive, he questions whether any of this is real, or if it's just part of the story he signed up for at Rekall.

Review:

Tim: I saw no reason for the existence of this movie. The original Total Recall proved to be far better than it had any reason to be. The film is only 22 years old, and there was no legitimate reason why a remake was necessary. Still, I tried to give this film a chance. Unfortunately, it's a completely toothless, forgettable, bland movie. I stopped caring about anything that was happening on screen long before the movie ended. This movie should never have been made.

The original was so cool because it touched on themes like technology, the human brain, and reality itself. This is a by-the-numbers action film that instead of making you questions the powers of the human mind, comes across as completely mindless. The original film was interesting, challenging, and exciting. This film is exactly like dozens of other movies you've already seen.

I honestly can't think of one single thing about this movie that I loved. There were many things wrong with it, a few that were fine, but nothing spectacular. It's a completely forgettable film in almost every way. I spent the first half of the movie trying to get engaged with the story and the characters, and when that didn't work, I spent the second half trying to keep my mind focused on the film.

Colin Farrell gives a decent performance, but there was nothing about his Douglas Quaid that stood out to me. There wasn't anywhere near enough character development, so we never really feel connected to his character. That negates everything else that happens in the film. There's no emotional punch because we haven't gotten to know his character at all. We can't become invested in the story. That's not Farrell's fault, although he never should have signed on to this film.

Kate Beckinsale, on the other hand, was quite strong. Her character is too one-dimensional, but she gets to give a physical, exciting performance. I just think about the relentlessness of her character, and I am impressed. Beckinsale might not be a great actress, but she was wonderfully unlikable in this film. She plays the role with glee. She very well could have been the best aspect of the whole film. Unfortunately, it did feel like her husband, director Len Wisemen, spent more time making sure she'd look cool than actually crafting a strong movie.

Jessica Biel adds absolutely nothing to the movie. There was a time when I thought she could be a cool actress, and someone whose movies I looked forward to. That time is long gone. If Jessica Biel is in a movie, I start to brace myself for something bad. Her performance here is totally one-note, and utterly unmemorable in every way. She is not a good actress. I did enjoy seeing Bryan Cranston, but his part was laughably stupid. Bill Nighy isn't able to add anything to the film. John Cho is a guy I like, but he had nothing to do in a blink-and-you'll-miss-him role. The cast as a whole was less than mediocre.

There were a lot of big action scenes in this film, but none of them were particularly memorable. Wisemen didn't really create any truly outstanding action sequences in the Underworld movies, and he doesn't do much here. The magnetic car chase scene was probably the highlight, but there were only fleeting moments of coolness there. I checked out during the surprisingly bland elevator action scenes. There was a huge climactic battle at the end, but honestly, I was so disengaged that it barely registered. I just didn't care at all by that point. At 118 minutes, this movie is way too long. The action never looked all that impressive, either. We're supposed to be in this futuristic world, but the special effects just came across as cheap and small. Even when something huge happened- like the explosion of the Fall thing, it just came across as underwhelming.

I really don't want to be all negative, as there were a few good things about this film. As I mentioned, Beckinsale was a lot of fun to watch here. The whole idea of Rekall, and of wondering if your experiences are real or part of a dream is a fascinating concept. While it wasn't explored nearly enough here, it's still fun to ponder that. There were a few cool moments sprinkled throughout the film. If this movie hadn't already been made, and made significantly better, I might have liked this movie more.

Unfortunately, 2012's version of Total Recall has no bite. I really hope that Hollywood learns a lesson here- don't remake movies that need no remake. Come up with a clever, original idea. I'm glad this film did poorly at the box office, and I hope future remakes suffer the same fate. Now, if this movie had completely blown me away, I'd be singing a different tune. Unfortunately, this movie looked disappointing, and it turned out to meet our expectations. This is not even remotely close to being a good movie.

Rating 1-10
Tim's Rating- 5.5



If You Enjoyed This Movie, We Recommend: Total Recall (1990), Tigerland, Minority Report, Underworld, Stealth